I went, I saw, but I didn't drink the koolaid...

For those of you who might have wondered where I have been lately, I have been on Planet Cheerleader. I am still recovering from the effects of reentry. This weekend I was in Providence at the Convention Center for two days with my family and about 2 million other people and about as many permutations of lycra, sequins and glitter that you could ever imagine, each more garish than the next. The music was so loud my sternum was vibrating. The second day K2 and I wore ear plugs. Hubby is much more tolerant of loud music, but acknowledges he is probably already slightly deaf .

There were probably more than 50 teams competeing in different levels. Being a fan of dance and gymnastics, I was hoping to watch the other teams. But I quickly found myself running for refuge from the onslaught of superbass. I could only stand it for 15 or twenty minutes at a time, and that was spent watching K1's team. She was nervous but loving it and still loves it, but I can't hide from her what it takes out of me.

We were like passengers of a cancelled flight, roaming the crowds, paying 9 dollars for a banana and a bottle of water at the concession, propped up in corners on the floor of the outer hall awash in a sea of cheer people. We invented games and I taught K2 a little photography compostion. On the second day she fell asleep on my lap in a 120 decibel fishbowl of sound with one ear plug in and my palm over her other ear. I felt so bad for her I let my leg fall asleep and did not move.
The things we do for our children.

A few of the other parents had the frowning lost look that reflected how I felt. We found each other in the crowd and every one had the same question. So what are we supposed to be doing? I suppose I had silent commrades in my inner outrage, but little was said. We were all too dazed.
There is this tally sheet going in my mind.

$450 for hotel, food for 4, including tickets @ $25 dollars a head x 3 :the price for the exquisite auditory torture at 124dB. K1 as a participant was tortured for free, although she enjoyed less of it being on the stage behind the bank of speakers.

Sandblasting, Loud Rock Concert 115dB
Pain begins 125dB
Pneumatic riveter at 4' 125dB
Jet engine at 100', Gun Blast 140dB

I figure I must be spending too much time in my cave to not be able to comprehend that people actually want to do this for FUN!

I am still processing (always processing) but the thing that struck me is the extremeness of it all. The music has to be louder, the costumes more glittery, the makeup heavier, --faster! more! bigger! Somehow it has grown past ridiculous to the point of true insanity. Does no one notice? Or is it just to unpopluar to speak up? Or is this what the majority really wants? The market usually provides what the people buy, do is this what people really want?

Whichever, I am not one of them. I did not, can not, and will not drink the koolaide.

Since I honor my commitments, I will honor this one and willingly agree to submit until the beginning of May. I will likely be a little deafer and perhaps punch drunk from the assault on my presumably more refined sensitivities, but even more committed to living a sane and rational life.

My husband once told me to ask why five times. And now that I do the world looks much different.

PS. The job is still great, full of exciting potential and I am honing my manifestation skills. My mind is lit up like a pinball machine, and it feels so good after being buried for the last few years.